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Archive for March, 2009

Snowdrops!

In many places in my garden I have snowdrops, all from one or two plants Paul’s mother gave me in the 1970s. The above picture is not from my garden, but it’s a sort of inspiration for what one can do……….It took years before the original plants (which  I divided) in the front yard began to naturalize and self-sow themselves but it has now been years since they did. And if you dig up one plant and divide it into several bits and plant them in different places, they all seem to take well and grow into large clumps and then sow themselves. They are such a sweet sign of spring. In 1974 I was walking in the Pilisy hills north of Budapest with Paul’s cousin Madi and we found children with snowdrops they had gathered. Madi asked where they had found them and they shouted back, “Az erdoben.” This means “in the forest ” and wasn’t too much help since that is where we were! In an immense forest where one could walk for hours.

note: I don’t know how to get the correct Hungarian accents in this blog! The “o” in erdoben should have two dots above it.

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Matchbox dumptruckThis is almost what it looked like, a little matchbox dump truck my nearly 27 year old son had when he was about three years old. We were having dinner at the cottage at Lake Chautauqua one Sunday afterternoon. I don’t remember the topic of conversation, but I do remember that my husband Paul had a lot of wise words to offer on the subject, while at his right hand sat little Andy driving his matchbox truck back and forth over the tablecloth.  When Paul finished, Andy looked up at him and said, “See my dump truck, Daddy!” Paul burst out laughing and said, “I’d call that a non-sequitor, son”. Andy looked a little confused but  answered seriously, “Oh. I call it a dump truck”. And ever since that day my family has used the term ‘dump truck” to mean a non-sequitor. When we radically change the subject in a conversation we say, “Here comes a dump truck”. I probably say it more than anyone!

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Stone Archway, Doorway, Provence, France Photographic Print by Ken GlaserDon’t you love doorways? They are so mysterious, so alluring. You can imagine what new worlds lie on the other side…………This is a print by Ken Glazer of a doorway in Provence…..Ancient and mysterious. I love seeing doorways, and also in life or art, I love seeing a winding road which bends so that I cannot see what lies ahead,

This is life. It is a journey which is always changing and always has something hidden and usually wonderful ahead for us. Every morning is a new beginning, every breath. We are so blessed and so fortunate. No matter what comes, this is the only way to regard it!

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a sad controversy

szent-imre-clevelandI have removed my original post about the closing of Szent Imre because I think I was too emotional and judgemental about the issue.  It was clear to me after I calmed down that even though I said I was only judging the actions and not the man, this was not quite the case.

My opinions have not altered, but I do not see a need to make them so public.

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I just put up a new header for my blog……..It’s the first time I have succeeded in doing this! So, that’s the new skill…..This is a picture from a day trip Andy, Paul and I took in the summer of 2005. We went by steam locomotive up the Yukon Trail from Skagway to Bennett Lake in British Colombia. It was a beautiful day, a wonderful memory from the last really good summer of Paul’s life. A beautiful country. We are all journeying through a beautiful country, all the time, if we open our eyes. It’s there. We just have to be there too.

This morning Alice and Nathan were here for hours. I used to be much stronger physically. I think I can regain a lot of that, with some work. But I don’t have it now. So Alice who has strength plus good ideas, a great combination, came to help me move furniture around. We’re trying to declutter the family room and arrange it better and also, find a way for my drawing table to fit into the room! Things are moving up stairs and downstairs and many are leaving the house altogether………All to the good. It will happen. It will feel more like a home again and less like a warehouse! Alice, if you’re reading this, thank you again for your invaluable help!!!!!

My Hero!

My Hero!

Ok, here is a picture of mighty Alice who tosses furniture from one end of the house to the other and cleans and gives me lots of great ideas!

I had lots of fun with Nathan, too, as all this was going on. He seems to have grown up a lot recently. He seems like a very big boy for four years old……..We read the story of Babushka Baba Yaga and played a bit of a game and talked and watched Home on the Range and had lunch together…..Actually, the moment Nathan arrived he asked for a hot dog! He definitely is in a growth surge that’s affecting his appetite. But I’m glad to see it after the days after his surgery when he barely ate a thing! Life feels very good at the moment! My heart is full of gratitude.

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Remembering Our Mothers

Remembering Our Mothers

Today is Mothering Sunday in the UK, not our American Mother’s Day, but similar. A blog that I read spoke of what the writer had done with her mother that day and how her church had given all women flowers and especially remembered those who had lost their mothers and who were longing to become mothers without, as yet, success.

It is nearly a decade since I lost the mother who raised me, and 64 years since I lost my birth mother. Paul’s mother died in 2004 and we visited her grave in a little country cemetery in Germany in 2005, our last time in Europe together.  This is a picture of Paul with the temporary wooden cross at his mother’s grave near Gruenkraut in Germany. It has since been replaced with a stone marker.  And now Paul also has left us.

This picture has a lesson about the imperanence of all on earth. A lesson to cherish those we have with us when we have them, and to let that caring and loving kindness move out to all who share this amazing gift of life. Be awake. Be mindful. Be loving.

Also, I wanted to say I am sorry for having been so judgemental in my comments about blogs yesterday! Not good. Not good at all.

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I read over the blogs that I like this morning.  I enjoy some of them most of the time and probably all of them some of the time, but I wonder. There are some that sound so self-proccupied and written with the reader in mind in a way that aims to elicit awe and admiration. Is this inevitable? Is it an unavoidable part of blogging? It dismays me…….. 

One woman who shares her interesting life on a small acreage in the south wrote about her hands today. It seemed like a paean of self-praise. As did another recent post about the  worthy simplicity of her life which ended with mentioning that her son and his family don’t esteem simplicity as much as she does. If I were that son my feelings would surely be hurt. Maybe I will skip her blog for a while.  There are many good things on it, but there are some which are difficult to hear. Very difficult………It makes me wonder if I should skip my own blog for a while. But I doubt if even my children are reading my blog…..I like the pictures, anyway………So here are a few from the Rocky River Reservation part of Cleveland metroparks, the stamping grounds of my childhood………

 Cleveland Metroparks in Fall by digipixguy.CentennialBarn by digipixguy.Well, this one is not actually IN the metroparks……….But I like the memory.The old Detroit Rd. bridge being built, the one which was across the road from my father’s dental office, before it was demolished in 1980 and everything was changed…….I want to post some more bridge pictures, but the blog is not letting me do so in this post………

 

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